August 30, 2007
Arms Race
I know nothing about rap/hip-hop music, except that I don't like it. To be honest, it all sounds the same to me and it all seems to be about superficial crap. Regardless, I love the names under which some of these guys perform. For example, tomorrow is 40 Cal.'s birthday; I've never heard of him, but he must be somebody in that world. 40 Cal., 50 cent (known as "fitty"), both references to money and/or weapons. With this in mind, here are my potential stage names for when I take the hip-hop world by storm:
1. Buck Thirty (spelled 1.30)
2. Bill Yun ( or Biggie B)
3. 88 (after 88MM, the caliber of a WW2 German howitzer)
4. 16in (pronounced "sixteen in", but referencing 16 inches, the bore of the main guns on Iowa-class battleships)
5. Case (as in 24, as in 12 Tupacs)
I gotta quit.
August 28, 2007
Toilet Patrol
Senator Larry Craig of Idaho, a Republican, was arrested in June on a charge of "disorderly conduct" for supposedly attempting to give an undercover cop signals that are normally used by gay men asking for an anonymous hook-up. Today, Craig came out swinging, claiming that he is not gay and that he only pleaded guilty to the charge in order to clear it up quickly. If that's true, it was a colossally stupid move on his part.
Some of you will say that if the senator was a Democrat, I would be calling for his head. That's true, because the media certainly would not bring as much heat down on a liberal (remember Barney Frank?). But I digress. My point is that I don't see a crime here. Let's assume that Craig really was soliciting sex from a stranger. Can we assume that they were going to do it right there? If he was caught in the act, I could understand the arrest because there are standards of conduct that the law enforces in public places. But Craig did not do that; he was supposedly sending signals with his foot.
Furthermore, do the cops in Minneapolis not have any serious crimes to pursue? As far as I'm concerned, two gay men meeting in a public restroom and then leaving to pursue their desires is a victim-less crime. DO NOT talk to me about the morality of the situation----of course it's despicable if true. But morality and law are not always on the same side.
One more question: do female cops stake out the womens' restrooms at the Minneapolis airport?
August 27, 2007
A Dark God
Michael Vick has found Jesus. Of course, Vick has really found a good lawyer, a man who probably told him he needed to try some contrition in order to win public support....among black Americans.
Please remember this post: from here on out, the Michael Vick situation will be weighed in terms of race. The cruelty of dog fighting will be pushed aside as black leaders try to convince us that Vick is being persecuted because he is a successful black athlete. Remember the OJ trial? Stand by to see it re-played.
Vick is nothing but an arrogant punk. If there is any justice in the universe, something horrible will happen to him, rendering him unable to play football ever again. Or hurt another animal or person.
August 26, 2007
The End?
As you can tell, my posts here are starting to become more rare. I am considering closing this blog down, simply because I find that I'm tired of discussing politics, culture, etc., the topics that influenced me to start blogging in the first place. Furthermore, there are only about 30 people visiting this site daily; I appreciate your continued support, but I have a podcast that is listened to by 12,000+ people a day---you see where my time should be spent.
I'll make my decision this week.
August 23, 2007
Update
Sorry for the lack of posts over the past week. I have had some network problems at Casa Dattilo but, hopefully, they will be ironed out tonight and all will continue as before. I hope I haven't lost too many podcast subscribers, which reminds me:
Please visit the Matt's Today in History page at Audible.com and consider signing up for a 14-day trial of their audiobook service. I have been an Audible user for a while now; it's almost the only way I get to "read" long books these days.
August 19, 2007
August 16, 2007
On The Group
When I was a kid, my parents received long, typed-written letters from people they only saw sporadically. They were people from their childhoods who moved away or the families of men with whom dad was in the Navy. To me, they remained a mystery. They were all wildly successful, because their letters went something like this:
"What a year it's been for Jim and I and our family! Janie had another boy, making for a total of 8 wonderful grandchildren! John got promoted to Holy Roman Emperor---he makes more than the GDP of Liberia! He's promised to build us a retirement home next to his beach house in Belize! Speaking of grandkids, Justin won the state championship in pole vaulting and John, jr. got accepted to Harvard!"
You get the point. In truth, these letter say "we're wealthy and our family is genetically superior." Great. I would have been happy to see this narcissistic tradition die away with the 20th century, but it continues today in the form of long e-mails sent to an enormous group of people (with all e-mail addresses visible to all recipients). Please don't send these to me or to anyone else. There are exceptions. First, if someone is recovering from surgery or is in the hospital, it is appropriate to keep friends and family informed via e-mail. Second, if you are in the military and in a war zone, group e-mails are fine. Why these two exceptions? Because, most of the time, they are short and to the point and are sent by people whose time needs to be spent on something else. In my opinion, anyone who can send a 5 page e-mail has too much time on his hands. So do people who blog and do podcasts, I suppose.
There are a few people in my life who send out these e-mails and I can't help but think they do it to feed their egos. Because I know these people fairly well, I believe I have the right to expect either a personal e-mail or non at all. When I look at the list of people to whom they send these weighty tomes, I see people I know they haven't spoken to in years. Note: if you haven't spoken to someone in over two years, you are no longer the tight buddies you were in high school or college. Plus, to be blunt, they are probably not interested in your life. That's just the way it is.
If you want to expound on your life and how great it is, start a blog. This way, people can visit it or not without a 2,000-word short story showing up their inbox. Yes, I understand that you can just delete the e-mail and not read it, but I believe it is presumptive to send it in the first place. It's as if the author thinks you believe in his self-serving drivel as much as he does.
On the civility scale, I put people who write long group e-mails and don't know how to use the blind carbon copy feature of their e-mail client up there with people who talk loudly on their cell phones in the middle of crowded public spaces. They're important, and they need you to know it.
August 13, 2007
August 12, 2007
Vasa
When I produce an episode of Matt's Today in History, I rarely have time to delve into a subject to the depth I would like. However, I have to admit that I have wasted a lot of time this weekend reading up on the Vasa, the Swedish warship that foundered on her maiden voyage in 1628. It's a great story. I'll be recording the podcast tomorrow as soon as I get home from work; I hope you'll give it a listen. It's one of my favorites.
Speaking of the podcast, there is something significant on the horizon. I can't talk about it now because it may not happen, but I'll let you know as soon as I can. Thanks to all of you who encouraged me over the past two years. This podcast is one of the few times in my life I have come up with an idea and followed it through instead of talking myself out of it or allowing others to do so. I just thought it up and did it.
Above all, it never would have happened without the lovely Kelli's support. She encouraged me like no one else and she puts up with the significant time I spend in front of this Mac. She told me early on that this thing was going somewhere; she had faith in me that I have never had in myself.
August 10, 2007
August 09, 2007
Chuck Norris / Bruce Willis, Call Your Office
There was a time, not so long ago, when every dangerous activity in the world had a GoTo Guy. For example, say one of your oil wells caught on fire. You called Red Adair. No one else came to mind; there was no second place finisher. You called Red, he put the fire out. Done.
Technology has removed a lot of dangerous activities from our lives, but the mine disaster in Utah reminds me that we still need "goto" guys. There should be a guy who gets the call at 3AM when there's a cave-in. He's 50ish, a little cynical and surrounded by outcast guys who happen to be the best in the business. You've seen this movie, probably 20 or 30 times; the latest example is "Armageddon", in which Bruce Willis takes a group of oil workers into space to blow up an asteroid. Uh huh.
The mine crew would show up at the mine as the sun peeks above the horizon. GoTo Guy, who is always in trouble with the federal mining safety officials, immediately gets into an argument with the on-scene commander that ends with, "Do you want to save these guys!!!??? Then get out of my way and let me do my job!" He then punches a reporter in the face and heads into the mine. He also works the phrase, "F*&k you and your lawyers!" into the conversation, which earns him my undying respect.
Of course, GoTo Guy was killed by lawyers, political-correctness and the Oprahfication of the American male. The century that brought us barnstorming failed to bring us tort reform. I suppose that, one thousand years from now, the GoTo Guy will have achieved the mythic status of Zeus and Apollo for his rarity.
Once again, born too late.
August 08, 2007
August 07, 2007
Your Theme
If you're old enough, you remember when Johnny Carson's band would play a theme song for every famous guest on his show. Dean Martin's theme was "That's Amore" (I think). When Elvis went on stage, the orchestra played the "2001" music (the proper name escapes me). My point is that while we have pretty much abandoned the personal theme song, we need to bring it back. For everyone. Tip of the hat to Adam Carolla, American Genius.
Think of what you're well-known for, or think of a song you've always liked---BAM!!!---you're in business. What are my theme songs, you ask? Well, since you're dying to know, here are a few candidates:
1. Opening theme from 'Victory at Sea'
2. Theme from 'The Pink Panther'
3. 'Indiana Wants Me' by R. Dean Taylor (only used when out of state)
4. Theme from the TV show 'Dallas' (only used outside of Texas)
5. Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries"
6. Rolling Stones' "Paint it Black
You get my point. It probably says something about me that none of those tunes were written in the past 25 years. I'd love to hear some of your themes.
August 06, 2007
From Below
As I write this, six miners are believed trapped in a Utah mine. Innovations in safety equipment have made underground mining safer than it was a generation ago, but it is still hazardous work. When something like this happens, I can't help but think how bizarre it is that we rely on men to work underground and dig up flammable rocks, much as people have been doing for most of recorded history. Of course, almost everything we use to produce energy comes from the ground: oil, uranium, etc.
I used to work with a man who was born in a company-owned town in West Virginia. When the town's coal mine closed down in the early 70's, the company closed the town as well. I suppose the land was sold off to someone else, but the town died. This man's hometown ceased to exist because the coal seam was used up.
August 04, 2007
The Deuce Four
My friend Rich, who has a personal stake in this war, sent me a link to the following article. Please take a moment and read it. Stories such as this make me realize that in 50 years, this generation of men and women may very well be remembered as another 'Greatest Generation'. Being of military age as I still am, I can't help but feel a little inadequate when I read about these guys.
I learned something in the Navy that has stuck with me, and I'm willing to bet the same holds true for these Army chaps: in peacetime, on base or off, they are probably grabasstic and ready to goof off at a moment's notice. I remember some of the guys I served with and I wondered how they were going to perform when the chips were down and the heat was on. I was misjudging them badly. The fact is that the clown you joke with or the guy who's a constant flirt can turn on a dime and be the best warriors our nation can produce. This may sound corny, but I think this has become an American trait: we may play jokes on each other and fight among ourselves, but let someone from the outside cause trouble and see what happens.
August 02, 2007
Political Spin In 3,2,1...
Rep. James Oberstar, the Minnesota Democrat who chairs the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, blamed President George W. Bush's administration for shortchanging road and bridge repair in a highway funding bill two years ago.
Bush, he said, "failed to support a robust investment in surface transportation," adding the president insisted on only $2 billion a year for bridge reconstruction when lawmakers were pushing for $3 billion a year.
Hey, Congressman Dickhead, here's a fact: there are still dead bodies trapped under that bridge. Could you wait, maybe, a week before becoming a Major League asshole again? If you're not a lawyer, you should be. Democrats, he's one of yours; be proud. Very proud. Asshat.